the zone concert yesterday was amazing. the atmosphere, the songs chosen, the message preached...all made for a very unforgettable night. compared to last year, i enjoyed this one much, much more, partly because i wasn't being a part-time security guard watching over the bags of my friends, but more so because i know more hillsong songs than planetshaker songs. but i still like both of them. :) it was also nice to see a few friends i haven't seen in quite a while, and my friends with me also enjoyed themselves, i think. i hope. :)
***
i only realised today, for the first time ever, that i have been pretty selfish every time i book out. maybe it's because i've been deprived of the luxuries i once took for granted, or because army hasn't changed my homely nature, i try to spend as much time as i can at home. and when that happens i often face the computer more than i do with my parents. it's not that we don't talk, we just talk over meals, but once i'm at home, they pretty much know they can't win against the computer.
so, with this epiphany today, i volunteered to accompany them to go shopping, although i could have chosen to go home early. in fairness to them, they didn't really promise we'd come home as soon as we were done, but they did say that after they were done buying we could go home. as it is, i spent the entire afternoon at a book shop reading while my parents happily shopped for a couple of hours, before an early dinner at 5. by the time i realised the sun was setting, i felt utterly cheated. it wasn't so much of missing some gaming time (although that's precious), but more so to catch my breath at home and prep my stuff before i went back to camp for the final time in this course. and so my hopes of going home by 4 were dashed, and i didn't even know.
as a result, i was, and still am, debating whether i am going to do "parent escort services" (as sir neo puts it) on future sundays.
oh well. i suppose you give some, take some.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
john 11:33-35
When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled.
"Where have you laid him?" he asked. "Come and see, Lord," they replied.
Jesus wept.
"Where have you laid him?" he asked. "Come and see, Lord," they replied.
Jesus wept.
Friday, May 16, 2008
sometimes, deep down, i still feel like a kid trapped inside a teenager's body.
sure, my age is increasing, but some part of me still clings to that playful, childish, kiddy person i was/still am.
people come and go, my everyday environment changes, weekends come and go, but i still feel like i haven't changed much. or have i?
i'm still not sure i'm ready to grow up.
oh, and trying to keep in touch with old friends is hard.
sure, my age is increasing, but some part of me still clings to that playful, childish, kiddy person i was/still am.
people come and go, my everyday environment changes, weekends come and go, but i still feel like i haven't changed much. or have i?
i'm still not sure i'm ready to grow up.
oh, and trying to keep in touch with old friends is hard.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
i just read this article in newsweek yesterday about how many movies these days don't end properly. and as i was reading, i was thinking what was the last movie i watched that really left a deep impression on me, and to my amazement, the answer was that in spite of the numerous films i've watched, there are none which can really qualify as classics. sure, classics have to be able to withstand the test of time, and they're the ones whom people will still remember at least 1 generation later. that's why films like casablanca, gone with the wind et al. are really considered great (though i haven't watched them before, i've heard of them even in these days, so there's the test of time for you)
there also seems to be a trend of having a lot of movies featuring superheroes, or at least, heroes with superpowers, on top of their brains/courage/skills (take your pick, though most of them have these too). it reminded me of what pastor said once, that people are making these films, because in all our hearts, there is a cry for a true Hero. not one that has to fight and keep fighting the bad guys over and over and all over again, but One who needs only one final Victory. but they don't realise this Hero is jesus. one victory to defeat the devil, sin, and death, and which has brought untold peace like never ever before.
that's why the heroes of this world have to keep fighting, because they never have one single complete victory over the forces of evil/darkness. and that's why people keep following these heroes, because they never have a true peace that passes all understanding. not to mention all the loss in terms of merchandise.
anyway, i'm getting distracted. i just think that film makers these days should aim to make a great movie. a truly classic one. rather than making one as a merchandise. make the movie a classic, and the merchandising will follow. that's why films like star wars still have so many fans till this day (i'm one too).
by the way, iron man was nice. not spectacular, but nice. stay till after the creds roll for the bonus clip.
now, let me declare that i am not against liking superheroes and whatnot. my two "favourite" heroes are batman and spiderman, whom i think are really smart, and yet they're real and human enough. but the point is, to have these comic book characters as someone you look up to, that is really sad. and it's also disheartening to know that there are so many people turning to these fictional characters instead of turning to the One True Hero.
and that breaks my heart.
there also seems to be a trend of having a lot of movies featuring superheroes, or at least, heroes with superpowers, on top of their brains/courage/skills (take your pick, though most of them have these too). it reminded me of what pastor said once, that people are making these films, because in all our hearts, there is a cry for a true Hero. not one that has to fight and keep fighting the bad guys over and over and all over again, but One who needs only one final Victory. but they don't realise this Hero is jesus. one victory to defeat the devil, sin, and death, and which has brought untold peace like never ever before.
that's why the heroes of this world have to keep fighting, because they never have one single complete victory over the forces of evil/darkness. and that's why people keep following these heroes, because they never have a true peace that passes all understanding. not to mention all the loss in terms of merchandise.
anyway, i'm getting distracted. i just think that film makers these days should aim to make a great movie. a truly classic one. rather than making one as a merchandise. make the movie a classic, and the merchandising will follow. that's why films like star wars still have so many fans till this day (i'm one too).
by the way, iron man was nice. not spectacular, but nice. stay till after the creds roll for the bonus clip.
now, let me declare that i am not against liking superheroes and whatnot. my two "favourite" heroes are batman and spiderman, whom i think are really smart, and yet they're real and human enough. but the point is, to have these comic book characters as someone you look up to, that is really sad. and it's also disheartening to know that there are so many people turning to these fictional characters instead of turning to the One True Hero.
and that breaks my heart.
Saturday, May 03, 2008
much to my surprise, class lunch yesterday (ok specifically wednesday) was pretty well attended! let me try to recall:
carol, matt, ai zhen, jt, jonny, eden, yuanshan, li ru, claire, kelvin, qin pei, tai hao, val, velden, carl, kenneth, and me. wow 17 people! amazing! and i thought no one gave a rip about the class. turns out i was wrong. :)
had a fun, albeit shorter than expected, lunch with them, and i did enjoy the conversations, as well as the short exchanges, with them. esp kelvin, claire, carol, carl and jt, who were my immediate neighbours. it was nice to see that nothing drastic had happened within these few months, and i could feel that we were all still pretty comfortable in each other's presence, though i had to keep forcing myself to only smile instead of grinning from ear to ear.
after lunch a few of them left, and the rest of us wandered to the cinema, before deciding not to catch a movie because some others had to leave by the time the show ended. so we went to play in the arcade instead, and my best moment came when ai zhen was playing silent hill (gasp!) and suddenly i shook her by the neck just as her first enemy appeared. her last life got killed and it was game over! wahahahaha 4 tokens gone just like that.
subsequently, after arcade and after a few feeble attempts by the guys at the use-the-hammer-and-smash-the-scale game to defeat the high score, we then went to marina square from suntec to play bowling or pool. ended up playing pool, though not before i played 2 rounds of virtua striker, that lame soccer arcade game which i never fail to play. and lose at it.
after pool the few of us left went to macs for dinner (velden had a craving). jk joined us, and after dinner, some of them had decided to leave when kenneth, me and jk said we'd catch a movie, or jk would have joined us for dinner. and nothing else. so we went back to the cinema a 3rd time, and decided on watching doomsday, because i saw its trailer on the tv and macs and decided it would be quite a nice show.
after coming out at 11pm (the show started at 9pm), i was just..."wth just happened." i'm not even going to comment on the show. just to say that other than a pretty lead character, everything else was just....totally, completely random. i'd use the s word too (no, not a 4-letter one), but "random" fits the bill more. suffice to say that there was lots of gore, vulgarities and even some naked scenes. (no it's not the lead) and it was already quite censored. for the first time in my life, i'd watched a non-PG show, and i didn't even know it. i think i'm still not very ready for this kind of film, so you won't see me watching a gory show any time soon. of course, if the lead character is the same, i'll give it a second thought. ;)
*
spent today (thursday) going to east coast park in the morning, and put on my rollerblades for the first time in 2 years. dad was with me, and the 2 of us, dad and son, just chilled out and spent some quality time together. not very much was said, but i guess he enjoyed the time as much as i did. i did a few rounds of blading, but after every like 100m i'd stop and sit for like 15 minutes. hey, i'm not training you know!
in the afternoon, went on the singapore flyer (the ferris wheel) for the first time with dad. price aside (a whopping $29.50!), i thought the ride epitomised the growth of singapore very well. not to be a mega-patriot or anything, but building the thing did show how sg is able to progress and keep up with the times, and build a state-of-the-art architectural marvel (it claims to be the tallest in the world). still, the building on the other side of the ECP was still higher than me at the top of the ride, so i was thinking maybe i should have just gone to that building instead. still, it was a nice ride. :)
*******
on another note, i think i have, by the Grace of God (nothing more, nothing less), started to come to terms with the fact that it is better for me (at least for now) to stay single and be unattached, both in body and in mind. i am only starting to realise how much freedom i truly have, to go out with any friend at any time i want, to spend more time with my family on top of how much i usually spend with them, and to be able to attend 2 churches on sunday without fail, and even youth every other saturday. it is a blessing to be unattached (for now). don't get me wrong, if you're dating then all the best, but i'm just saying that for me, at this point in time, i am a very free and happy single person.
boy, it took me like 3 years to realise this. but i still did. :)
carol, matt, ai zhen, jt, jonny, eden, yuanshan, li ru, claire, kelvin, qin pei, tai hao, val, velden, carl, kenneth, and me. wow 17 people! amazing! and i thought no one gave a rip about the class. turns out i was wrong. :)
had a fun, albeit shorter than expected, lunch with them, and i did enjoy the conversations, as well as the short exchanges, with them. esp kelvin, claire, carol, carl and jt, who were my immediate neighbours. it was nice to see that nothing drastic had happened within these few months, and i could feel that we were all still pretty comfortable in each other's presence, though i had to keep forcing myself to only smile instead of grinning from ear to ear.
after lunch a few of them left, and the rest of us wandered to the cinema, before deciding not to catch a movie because some others had to leave by the time the show ended. so we went to play in the arcade instead, and my best moment came when ai zhen was playing silent hill (gasp!) and suddenly i shook her by the neck just as her first enemy appeared. her last life got killed and it was game over! wahahahaha 4 tokens gone just like that.
subsequently, after arcade and after a few feeble attempts by the guys at the use-the-hammer-and-smash-the-scale game to defeat the high score, we then went to marina square from suntec to play bowling or pool. ended up playing pool, though not before i played 2 rounds of virtua striker, that lame soccer arcade game which i never fail to play. and lose at it.
after pool the few of us left went to macs for dinner (velden had a craving). jk joined us, and after dinner, some of them had decided to leave when kenneth, me and jk said we'd catch a movie, or jk would have joined us for dinner. and nothing else. so we went back to the cinema a 3rd time, and decided on watching doomsday, because i saw its trailer on the tv and macs and decided it would be quite a nice show.
after coming out at 11pm (the show started at 9pm), i was just..."wth just happened." i'm not even going to comment on the show. just to say that other than a pretty lead character, everything else was just....totally, completely random. i'd use the s word too (no, not a 4-letter one), but "random" fits the bill more. suffice to say that there was lots of gore, vulgarities and even some naked scenes. (no it's not the lead) and it was already quite censored. for the first time in my life, i'd watched a non-PG show, and i didn't even know it. i think i'm still not very ready for this kind of film, so you won't see me watching a gory show any time soon. of course, if the lead character is the same, i'll give it a second thought. ;)
*
spent today (thursday) going to east coast park in the morning, and put on my rollerblades for the first time in 2 years. dad was with me, and the 2 of us, dad and son, just chilled out and spent some quality time together. not very much was said, but i guess he enjoyed the time as much as i did. i did a few rounds of blading, but after every like 100m i'd stop and sit for like 15 minutes. hey, i'm not training you know!
in the afternoon, went on the singapore flyer (the ferris wheel) for the first time with dad. price aside (a whopping $29.50!), i thought the ride epitomised the growth of singapore very well. not to be a mega-patriot or anything, but building the thing did show how sg is able to progress and keep up with the times, and build a state-of-the-art architectural marvel (it claims to be the tallest in the world). still, the building on the other side of the ECP was still higher than me at the top of the ride, so i was thinking maybe i should have just gone to that building instead. still, it was a nice ride. :)
*******
on another note, i think i have, by the Grace of God (nothing more, nothing less), started to come to terms with the fact that it is better for me (at least for now) to stay single and be unattached, both in body and in mind. i am only starting to realise how much freedom i truly have, to go out with any friend at any time i want, to spend more time with my family on top of how much i usually spend with them, and to be able to attend 2 churches on sunday without fail, and even youth every other saturday. it is a blessing to be unattached (for now). don't get me wrong, if you're dating then all the best, but i'm just saying that for me, at this point in time, i am a very free and happy single person.
boy, it took me like 3 years to realise this. but i still did. :)
Thursday, May 01, 2008
the weather's pretty hot these days. and with more tough training ahead, including putting on more gear than usual, i don't know how i'll survive, but deep down i know that i will.
my normal life's revolving mostly around catching up with friends online, spending time with family, and finding that ever-elusive lego star wars wii game. i've searched more than half the stores here, and all have been sold out. i guess that happens when it was on sale since february. oh well, guess i'll comb the rest of the stores till i finally find it. or not.
i do find myself missing school less these days, and strangely enough, when a long break like this comes along once in a while, i somehow end up feeling strange that i don't have to wake up to run a few kilometers that morning. i guess the transition's almost complete.
not much else is happening these days. oh, i'm halfway through my 10 IV sessions. just 5 more pokes and i'll be through! i'd really like to get posted to air force, but we'll see what happens. i've already spurned the chance to join navy, because i can't stand the thought of not being at home for a possible 3 months. it's like confinement again!
i'm going for a class lunch pretty soon. it'll be fun to see how little, and yet how much, people have changed.
later!
my normal life's revolving mostly around catching up with friends online, spending time with family, and finding that ever-elusive lego star wars wii game. i've searched more than half the stores here, and all have been sold out. i guess that happens when it was on sale since february. oh well, guess i'll comb the rest of the stores till i finally find it. or not.
i do find myself missing school less these days, and strangely enough, when a long break like this comes along once in a while, i somehow end up feeling strange that i don't have to wake up to run a few kilometers that morning. i guess the transition's almost complete.
not much else is happening these days. oh, i'm halfway through my 10 IV sessions. just 5 more pokes and i'll be through! i'd really like to get posted to air force, but we'll see what happens. i've already spurned the chance to join navy, because i can't stand the thought of not being at home for a possible 3 months. it's like confinement again!
i'm going for a class lunch pretty soon. it'll be fun to see how little, and yet how much, people have changed.
later!
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Saturday, March 29, 2008
a lot's happened this month. some good, some not so good. but i don't really want to talk about it. i'm just glad it's over.
instead, i'd like to share a story my new bunk mate told me, which was, apparently told to us during math lecture last year. (somehow i missed it)
there was once a bird which had a very clear and sweet voice. so, it would fly around everyday, singing loudly and proudly. but one day, it lost its voice. it became very sad and started to feel cold. then along came a cow and dropped its poop on the bird. however, since the poop was fresh, it made the bird warm, and subsequently, happy again. it started to sing out loud once again! then alone came a dog, and ate the bird up, along with the poop.
there are 3 morals to the story.
1) the people who give you crap aren't necessarily your enemies.
2) the people who take away your crap aren't necessarily your friends.
3) when you're warm and comfortable, shut up.
instead, i'd like to share a story my new bunk mate told me, which was, apparently told to us during math lecture last year. (somehow i missed it)
there was once a bird which had a very clear and sweet voice. so, it would fly around everyday, singing loudly and proudly. but one day, it lost its voice. it became very sad and started to feel cold. then along came a cow and dropped its poop on the bird. however, since the poop was fresh, it made the bird warm, and subsequently, happy again. it started to sing out loud once again! then alone came a dog, and ate the bird up, along with the poop.
there are 3 morals to the story.
1) the people who give you crap aren't necessarily your enemies.
2) the people who take away your crap aren't necessarily your friends.
3) when you're warm and comfortable, shut up.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
i'm back from going outfield!
first of all, thank you aizhen for replying (so far). it's good to know that at least some classmates still miss the good ol' days. at least it means i'm not going insane/emo from daily training and being cut off from the rest of the world. but with results release coming up soon, that means i'll be able to see my classmates for one last time! (but that also means i'll probably never see all of them ever again. crap. will deal with that when the time comes) hopefully that day i can take many many photos with my classmates/friends!
i've never looked forward to a book out as much as this one, and although i'm going back in early for extra duty, which means i'll miss church for another week, as well as class dinner tonight, i still believe that verse which says that all things will work together for good. i just believe it.
training's going to be quite tough this coming week, but the Lord is my strength! after this week it should be better, but i'm also believing for a good week ahead too!
so agree with me!
first of all, thank you aizhen for replying (so far). it's good to know that at least some classmates still miss the good ol' days. at least it means i'm not going insane/emo from daily training and being cut off from the rest of the world. but with results release coming up soon, that means i'll be able to see my classmates for one last time! (but that also means i'll probably never see all of them ever again. crap. will deal with that when the time comes) hopefully that day i can take many many photos with my classmates/friends!
i've never looked forward to a book out as much as this one, and although i'm going back in early for extra duty, which means i'll miss church for another week, as well as class dinner tonight, i still believe that verse which says that all things will work together for good. i just believe it.
training's going to be quite tough this coming week, but the Lord is my strength! after this week it should be better, but i'm also believing for a good week ahead too!
so agree with me!
Saturday, February 09, 2008
it's about halfway through bmt!
but before i go back in for another week of confinement because of field camp, allow me to reuse my brain for the first time in weeks to prevent it from degeneration due to inactivity.
i seek your forgiveness if what i say seems to be painfully obvious, because once you're enlisted, "you see no day, you see no night, all you see is training", as my csm put it so aptly. so for me to say anything that makes sense should be regarded as quite an accomplishment already.
it has finally dawned on me what draws me (i don't presume to speak for others) to bookout days so much. apart from the obvious fact that we don't have to be ordered around, and even more important than having time to actually rest physically properly, is our chance to come back and meet real people.
human relationships. 2 simple words that mean so much to me right now. this cny break has allowed me to realise that above all that i cherish during my bookout times, it's the human interactions that i miss the most. now, don't get me wrong, we do interact with our platoon mates inside, as well as our superiors (though in this case it's 1-way communication), but seeing "civilians" (in our dictionary) is something entirely different. for one, you can talk about stuff besides training for once.
having said that, i do regret a little for not being able to spend more time with my friends (because for one reason or another a lot of people weren't free), though i am very thankful for having a great family, and for them to be there almost all the time, so that i wouldn't suffer more isolation. i could and should have spent less time in front of the com, and as each day passed i realised more and more that there's only so much gaming time you can have and not feel empty. surely there's more to life than just kotor/PES2008! maybe this is also why i sometimes wish i were attached, to have that "special someone" to spend time with. (ah the delusions of hopeless romantics) but i seriously believe that divine intervention is preventing me from having any sort of bgr because of the probably high chances of failure. still, sometimes one can't help but feel....... well, you know what i mean.
i do apologise for my lack of coherence in this post (how many times have i done this before?), but with another 12 days on tekong coming up, i'm starting to miss the people i've taken for granted these past few days again. and i don't want that to happen again.
you take my hand
and lead me to your side
your warm embrace
sets my heart on fire
you are my shelter
the God of all wonders
you are the hero of my life
i live for you
the saviour of my life
your love for me
is wider than the skies
you are my shelter
the God of all wonders
you are the hero of my life
you came for me
your life for mine
when i couldn't save myself
you bore my pain
my sin, my shame
jesus my lord my life
do tag/comment if you feel like it.
but before i go back in for another week of confinement because of field camp, allow me to reuse my brain for the first time in weeks to prevent it from degeneration due to inactivity.
i seek your forgiveness if what i say seems to be painfully obvious, because once you're enlisted, "you see no day, you see no night, all you see is training", as my csm put it so aptly. so for me to say anything that makes sense should be regarded as quite an accomplishment already.
it has finally dawned on me what draws me (i don't presume to speak for others) to bookout days so much. apart from the obvious fact that we don't have to be ordered around, and even more important than having time to actually rest physically properly, is our chance to come back and meet real people.
human relationships. 2 simple words that mean so much to me right now. this cny break has allowed me to realise that above all that i cherish during my bookout times, it's the human interactions that i miss the most. now, don't get me wrong, we do interact with our platoon mates inside, as well as our superiors (though in this case it's 1-way communication), but seeing "civilians" (in our dictionary) is something entirely different. for one, you can talk about stuff besides training for once.
having said that, i do regret a little for not being able to spend more time with my friends (because for one reason or another a lot of people weren't free), though i am very thankful for having a great family, and for them to be there almost all the time, so that i wouldn't suffer more isolation. i could and should have spent less time in front of the com, and as each day passed i realised more and more that there's only so much gaming time you can have and not feel empty. surely there's more to life than just kotor/PES2008! maybe this is also why i sometimes wish i were attached, to have that "special someone" to spend time with. (ah the delusions of hopeless romantics) but i seriously believe that divine intervention is preventing me from having any sort of bgr because of the probably high chances of failure. still, sometimes one can't help but feel....... well, you know what i mean.
i do apologise for my lack of coherence in this post (how many times have i done this before?), but with another 12 days on tekong coming up, i'm starting to miss the people i've taken for granted these past few days again. and i don't want that to happen again.
you take my hand
and lead me to your side
your warm embrace
sets my heart on fire
you are my shelter
the God of all wonders
you are the hero of my life
i live for you
the saviour of my life
your love for me
is wider than the skies
you are my shelter
the God of all wonders
you are the hero of my life
you came for me
your life for mine
when i couldn't save myself
you bore my pain
my sin, my shame
jesus my lord my life
do tag/comment if you feel like it.
Friday, February 08, 2008
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
japan trip
finally, just before i go, here's my post on japan. i'm too lazy to copy everything over, plus the photos, so just go here.
http://lahdder.livejournal.com/2008/01/08/
http://lahdder.livejournal.com/2008/01/08/
Thursday, December 27, 2007
after an unconscious writing self-exile/hiatus for a full 2 weeks, i'm ready to pick up a pen, or rather, start typing, and write (ah you get my point) again.
but i apologise. at the present moment my thoughts are unfocused, there are quite a few ideas running through my head; mostly about love, change, and people; but also partly about my new valencia jersey (which i still am getting the euphoria over). i promise to tell all that i want to (and all that i have) as soon as i can. which, realistically, is when i am back in sg on 31st. so my post will probably come with new year greetings or whatnot. anyway, suffice to say that although this is a holiday trip, i've probably learnt more about myself and my loved ones on this trip alone than the whole year combined. who says holidays aren't educational? but i digress.
anyway, for those who didn't receive any smses, hope you still had a blessed christmas, and do have a better new year (wait that's for my next post =p)
out.
but i apologise. at the present moment my thoughts are unfocused, there are quite a few ideas running through my head; mostly about love, change, and people; but also partly about my new valencia jersey (which i still am getting the euphoria over). i promise to tell all that i want to (and all that i have) as soon as i can. which, realistically, is when i am back in sg on 31st. so my post will probably come with new year greetings or whatnot. anyway, suffice to say that although this is a holiday trip, i've probably learnt more about myself and my loved ones on this trip alone than the whole year combined. who says holidays aren't educational? but i digress.
anyway, for those who didn't receive any smses, hope you still had a blessed christmas, and do have a better new year (wait that's for my next post =p)
out.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Friday, December 07, 2007
prom photos
i know i seem to keep biting my lip, but i was just trying to look cool. sorry lah.
http://s149.photobucket.com/albums/s69/lahdder/
http://s149.photobucket.com/albums/s69/lahdder/
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Lord of All My Days
You are the truth
The light, the way
My trust is in the power of Your name
And in Your promises so true
It's not about all that I am
But all to do with
Who You are to me
And all that You have done
You saved me
'Cos You loved me
Your grace gave me the highest way
Now I live by Your life in me
I am found in You always
Lifting my voice to give You praise
To You and You alone
The Lord of all my days
The light, the way
My trust is in the power of Your name
And in Your promises so true
It's not about all that I am
But all to do with
Who You are to me
And all that You have done
You saved me
'Cos You loved me
Your grace gave me the highest way
Now I live by Your life in me
I am found in You always
Lifting my voice to give You praise
To You and You alone
The Lord of all my days
© 2007 New Creation Church
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